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If Trump played DnD, what weapon would he use?
A priest enters a fish market.
I wanna name my puppy 'insane'...
Asian guy walks into a bar
So a guy walks into a bar and orders a pint of less.
Hillary's emails would make the perfect construction material for building the great Trump Wall...
50% of Canada
A boy went up to his father and said, "Your secret is out now dad. It's no use hiding it."
I just got the new iPhone for my wife
Boy to girl: So did it hurt?
I Think My Wife Is Poisoning Me.
Kung Fu student asks his teacher
A man tried to sell me a coffin today
Holding a gun to his teacher, the student demanded, "Tell me the square root of -2!"
Ha - mildly amusing
I want to live my next life backwards....
TIL the American flag on the moon has turned into the French flag.
I asked my GF, "Why do abortion jokes made you laugh so much?"
A woman walks onto a bus
There are four types of posts on Reddit
An Asian woman has twins, a boy and a girl.
A businessman breaks down on the side of a country road...
What's a pirate's favorite letter?
As a butcher is shooing a dog from his shop,he sees a $10 and a note in his mouth, reading: "5 lamb chops, please."
Why Moses was the one who received the ten Commandments
what's a pirate's least favorite letter?
A new monk arrived at the monastery.
Turns out when asked who your favorite child is...
What's a pregnant woman, a frozen beer, and a burnt pizza have in common?
An Irishman was drinking in a bar in London when he gets a call on his cell phone.
If you find 400 pounds on the street in England, you're a lucky man...
A guy goes to the post office to apply for a job. The interviewer asks him, “Are you allergic to anything?”
I recently learned that the Chinese word for "anus" is 屁眼 which literally means "the butt's eye"
A sad man at the bar
Why is it so hard to break up with your Japanese girlfriend?
I tried using a thesaurus to find synonyms for useless.
What did the Redditor say to the yogurt maker?
A chicken walks into the library and says to the librarian:
Blonde in a field.
Friends are like trampolines.
At the Burger King drive through I said “I’ll have Bruce Lee’s favorite burger please”
I hate German sauseges
Did you hear about the giant who had diarrhea?
A skeleton walks into a bar...
When does a joke become a dad joke
19 and 20 had a fight...
Doctor: What’s your zodiac sign?
A husband dies and goes into limbo for judgement
Why Don't vampires like gambling?
What has nine arms and sucks?
Three men were passengers on an airplane
A muscular man walks into a bar
Blind guy in bar
All men on earth die at the same time...
Three blondes were hiking in the woods when they came upon some tracks...
Preparing for Winter
Dark jokes are a lot like un vaccinated children
I went up to this fat bird in the pub last night.
When Canada stopped using pennies, my dad lost his job.
If you are afraid of paedophiles...
Just been reading some reviews of the solar system
[OC] A bull walks into a bar and orders a beer.
A young man from Alabama has been accepted to Harvard.
What did the hurricane say to the coconut tree?
What do John the Baptist and Winnie the Pooh have in common?
Why can't you own just one Stephen King novel?
I got angry when my waitress served me eggs with no bread
I'm not completely useless...
One day a man went to an auction. While there, he bid on an exotic parrot.
This is a joke from the 1920's
Have you heard of this bad doctor?
Pope is on an airplane
What's big and grey and can't swim?
The Stuck Peanut
They say, "An apple a day keeps the doctor away"...
An English man, German, French and Italian are standing at the side of a street watching a street performer
What did our parents do when they were bored with no internet?
I went to see a stage performer that does live sacrifices of celebrities during his act
Girl, are you a maple tree?
My wife keeps doing things that make me cross.
Caught wife having sex with my best friend.
What organ can expand to 10 times it's size...
Hamlet has to pee [Hamleak]
I remember after The Little Mermaid all the girls wanted to be mermaids. I asked "What do you know about breathing in water?" to one and she said...
Putin recently won the election with about 77 percent of the vote,
Never be ashamed of your fetish.
An Amateur challenged a professional wrestler to a match.
What's the difference between Dracula and a government worker?
Farmer - the other day I saw a baby cow jump over the fence
Trying to impress a girl.
A friend just got a brand new grand piano
A mathematician and an engineer...
A group of blondes go to the government
Two antennas met on a roof
If I get more money, I'll start eating less ramen.
A man went into a cafe and sat his six children at a table...
What happens to an Ethiopian child at the age of 13
Have you heard about the slutty math major?