Okay so, I am going to try and keep this brief.
I used to have a very high sex drive. I felt like I was constantly horny and I would say I maintained a healthy/responsible sex life. Then I started dating *John. John was everything I ever wanted except... he was not into sex. We dated for three years and what began with us having sex twice a week (which was fine) at the most, eventually got down to 4+ months of nothing. He turned me down any time I asked, and I won’t lie, it really got to me after a while. Over time, us not having sex became a huge issue in our relationship. We fought about it constantly and I felt absolutely pitiful begging my partner for sex/contact of any kind. Eventually we split for other reasons unrelated to sex (because it’s never just one thing) and ever since we split (9 months ago) I haven’t felt sexy or had any desire whatsoever. I bought a vibrator, I watch porn and I get off, but I don’t feel anything at all. I don’t feel fulfilled or sexually satisfied. I just feel numb. I feel like I’m on autopilot and I just masturbate because I can. I can’t ever conjure that desire I used to have before. I have tried to go out on dates with guys, but I don’t feel attraction in any way whatsoever.
I’m just wondering have any other women also experienced this sexual numbness? Should I try to completely detox from my vibrator/porn? Any suggestions at all....?
Thank you !