Hi, I'm in my mid-twenties and have never inserted anything into my vagina before, and the partner I'm with is the first person I've ever had any sexual activities with. I really want to feel close to him and fantasize often about feeling him in me, but I can't even get one finger in even after self-stimulating orgasms and using lubrication...

I went to see the OB-GYN to rule out physical issues, but she only left me with the advice to practice more, that I'm just too anxious/need more encouragement.

I think I'm very relaxed when I try fingering myself though. But maybe only up to as much as it feels good to me? When I get really into it, and I think I'm ready to slip my finger deeper, I can't really. I can't really tell if that's the entry. There isn't any give, much less some kind of "hole." And it feels very weird and makes me think I'm touching an internal organ I'm not supposed to. A little like Q-tipping my ears and there's a point where it hurts to dig deeper. When I try to prod a little more, I kind of get lazy too, and think, oh no, this is it, I can't get any deeper, maybe I'll just try again next time. Only it's been almost two months and I've made no headway. :(

Does anyone have any advice?

I was thinking of using cannabis... possibly alcohol to help.